On what we love about us

There is a voice  in every Mother's heart, that convinces her she has failed.
Ok I am pretty sure that feeling happens often, like daily during challenging times.
As a new Mom, a sleep deprived Mom, a stressed Mom and a Mom facing the real life fall out of a marital breakdown.
Yes, at times like these, a Mother can feel quite certain that her children have been scarred for life.

Hindsight gives a different perspective   - and what I can see now is that we were initially in a constant state of clinging onto and hoping for some kind of familiar territory, as all humans do when faced with change.
Sometimes we went through the motions bravely and many more times,
we did not. In those times, we boldly expressed our sentiments about change and lack of control
and sadness and loss. We cried a lot. Talked a lot.
We indulged our need to grieve - and rightfully so. We did so openly and candidly, with raw and real conversations, the kind that make your voice shake. The kind that might be remembered sometime in the future..

It's been nearly two years since our family divided itself into two households.
Since then, I am happy to report that I can see and feel the centring and settling in.
We certainly faced our share of challenges to arrive at this point. We learned a lot about compassion and non judgement, for others, as well as for ourselves.

Now it seems, there  is a comfort, peace and stillness in our home. That is a blessing beyond words.
Greater still, is the blessing of knowing my daughters feel it too.

The other day, my littlest girl, set about to create a special gift for her mama - secretly she went to work and created a lovely little package with an opening - on top it had a question posted to it,
which read, "write something you like that happened in our house"
Beside it was a notebook, pen and an opening in which to drop your notes.

Where on earth does this wise child get these depths from ?
Yet more heartwarming are the notes inside, carefully folded up and written by both girls....

"I like how we stick together" , "I like how we care for each other nomatter what ,"when we have a family hug and cuddle on the weekends" , "spending time together reading, cuddling, colouring and laughing"

Sometimes finding a "new normal" is as simple as pausing and listening to the needs and desires of our hearts, to do what we are most called to do. To love as purely as we can and to hold enough space within us for the honest  expression of these things.